|
The
day was warm, the weather was good, and no one could know the evil
that was lurking... Oh wait, wrong story.
JD
Dunne walked into the livery stable, a spring in his step. He opened
the door to his horse's stall and stepped inside.
|
JD's
POV: |
|
"Oh,
no! Milagro's leg's sore. Guess I'm going to have to *rent* a horse." |
<ominous
music playing annoyingly loud in the background>
The
Rental Horse jerked his head up from where it had just moments
before been contentedly munching on warm oats.
|
Rental
Horse's POV: |
|
"AGGgghhhhhhh!" |
|
JD's
POV: |
|
"Come
on, Mr. Rental Horse." He tried to coax the unwilling animal
from its stall. "We've got to take some seemingly important
Something-or-Other over to Eagle Bend. And I can't take my own horse
as he's hurt, so I'll have to take... you... instead." |
|
Rental
Horse's POV: |
|
"AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!"
<sobbing> |
JD
pulled on the horse's halter to no avail. "Come on, you stupid
stubborn mule! You're worse than Peso."
Peso
stamped his hoof on the ground. "Hey! I resent that!"
The
Rental Horse dug all four feet into the earth, refusing to budge.
"Oh, god please, not JD! Mommy! Mom-my!"
Peso
shook his head sadly at the seldom-used Rental Horse. "Oh,
you're a goner."
<sob>
<sound
of Taps playing>
"I'm
just an innocent Rental Horse, not the foil for some evil fanfiction
plot twist. Please," he cried out as he was pulled from the
stall and quickly tacked up, "someone saaave meeeee. Don't let
him take me."
But
it wasn't to be. JD Dunne and the Rental Horse were soon on their way.
Not
too much later there was a horrible, terrible, really icky accident.
"OW!
My leg!" The Rental Horse cried out, falling to the ground in
agony. "Hey, you broke my leg!"
Dunne
landed a few feet away and the Rental Horse tried in vain to roll
over the young man as he got to his feet. At least he could try to
get a few licks in before...
The
Rental Horse fell back to the ground, in broken-leg-agony. "Oh,
that's gonna leave a mark." He looked up when he saw the young
sheriff stalking towards him, rifle in hand.
"Hey,
what are you doing with that gun? Hey... Hey, get away from me with
that! I'm fine. Really. No problem. Look, doesn't hurt at all."
Thud! He hit the ground again. "No, please. Can't you just call
Triple A? Really, I'll be fine." He glared up at the
peacekeeper. "If you don't get away from me, I'm going to call
my lawyer, or... the Animal Cops, or... The SPCA? Heh, heh."
But
no amount of begging would help him. The Rental Horse sighed,
resigned to his fate. "I knew I should have negotiated for a
better contract," he bemoaned as he watched the young man lining
up his shot. "Never be the 'extra.' It's like being a nobody on
a Star Trek episode going out on a mission with the regulars. You're
gonna die."
"Oh,
cruel Fate!" the Rental Horse cried. "The hand that it
dealt me is slowly petering out. Now I'll never get to meet
Seabiscuit. Oh, the humanity. I mean... the... horseity." <giggle>
<sigh>
"Goodbye cruel world."
Bang! |
